Nostalgia to Paradise Under a Mother’s Feet

“I was born with an enormous need for affection, and a terrible need to give it.”

― Audrey Hepburn

Good morning my dear readers!

What a lovely morning, it’s a true spring beginning, I feel it in the air the way birds sing and coo, the way the sun shines in that mellow yellow that is one step closer to summer, in the way I feel, like I’m blooming…and it’s Friday, my favorite day of the week.

I was looking through old albums, actual ones, and I had a huge sense of nostalgia but I’m not sure why or for what. I thank God for not having lost a dear person to me, and I hope I won’t for a long time. Today is mother’s day in Jordan and most of the Arabic World, and this makes me think of my mom, my social butterfly, I woke up to tell her I love her and to give her a small gift only to find her bed empty!

I wanted to surprise her but she surprised me, as she always does… looking through my photos, arranged by each month I grew, memories I don’t remember but are saved for me from my dear mother’s hands, I think of the patience and love put in each photo and I smile. Photography now is so easy and trending, but years ago, it was difficult, limited and needed talent and cash. Thank you mom for each memory captured and made and for these albums. I love you.

Looking at my photos as a child doesn’t make me think “Aww, I was such a cute baby!”, no, they make me long to have a baby of my own that looks like me, perhaps a baby girl.

I think I’m longing to be a mother, and make albums and memories of my own… Can you have a nostalgia for something you never had?

I think I’m yearning to be a mother. It’s nature’s way I guess. A true womanhood calling. We say in Islam “Paradise lies under the feet of mothers.”, which is to say, how hard a job motherhood is, and how much we should appreciate our mothers, I hope I show my mom how much I appreciate, respect and love her all the time, because I do. She is the best gift Allah bestowed upon me, she raised me to be the woman I am today and without her I’m sure I wouldn’t have been raised to be the best version of myself.

To all the mothers out there, may Allah bless you. Paradise is truly under your tired feet.

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